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Feb. 6th, 2011

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

(no subject)

“Rape culture is telling girls and women to be careful about what you wear, how you wear it, how you carry yourself, where you walk, when you walk there, with whom you walk, whom you trust, what you do, where you do it, with whom you do it, what you drink, how much you drink, whether you make eye contact, if you’re alone, if you’re with a stranger, if you’re in a group, if you’re in a group of strangers, if it’s dark, if the area is unfamiliar, if you’re carrying something, how you carry it, what kind of shoes you’re wearing in case you have to run, what kind of purse you carry, what jewelry you wear, what time it is, what street it is, what environment it is, how many people you sleep with, what kind of people you sleep with, who your friends are, to whom you give your number, who’s around when the delivery guy comes, to get an apartment where you can see who’s at the door before they can see you, to check before you open the door to the delivery guy, to own a dog or a dog-sound-making machine, to get a roommate, to take self-defense, to always be alert always pay attention always watch your back always be aware of your surroundings and never let your guard down for a moment lest you be sexually assaulted and if you are and didn’t follow all the rules it’s your fault.”

Jan. 8th, 2011

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

(no subject)

Sheriff Clarence Dupnik, speaking about Arizona:

"When you look at unbalanced people, how they respond to the vitriol that comes out of certain mouths about tearing down the government. The anger, the hatred, the bigotry that goes on in this country is getting to be outrageous. And, unfortunately, Arizona I think has become sort of the capital. We have become the Mecca for prejudice and bigotry.

"It's not unusual for all public officials to get threats constantly, myself included. And that's the sad thing of what's going on in America. Pretty soon, we're not going to be able to find reasonable, decent people who are willing to subject themselves to serve in public office."

He later added:

DUPNIK: Let me just say one thing, because people tend to poo-poo this business about all the vitriol that we hear inflaming the American public by people who make a living off of doing that. That may be free speech. But it's not without consequences.

Dec. 24th, 2010

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

(no subject)

Merry Christmas everyone~ :) Spending it visiting my grandparents in Florida.

... I think I will need to be dragged back to cold DC kicking and screaming.

Dec. 22nd, 2010

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

hah. awesome.

Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.

Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it's written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.

Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.

Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation's OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.

Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.

Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.

Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.

Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.

Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.

Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.

Pronunciation -- think of Psyche!
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won't it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It's a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.

Finally, which rhymes with enough --
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!!!

-- B. Shaw

Sep. 30th, 2010

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

Can I please have some good jobhunting luck for a change

So... I catch a bus down to DC yesterday, as my job interview was scheduled for today. Literally as the bus is pulling into the parking lot in DC, I get an e-mail from the interviewer telling me she's sorry but she would like to cancel the interview because "just heard from the end user that there will not be a replacement of candidates. Initially, they had conveyed to us that they wanted everyone replaced."

She had confirmed the interview with me less than 24 hours prior to that, and the interview was scheduled for less than 24 hours from when she e-mailed me. Are you kidding me?? So incredibly pissed off. And that was going to be my first interview for an actual job... :(

Changed my ticket to just head back today instead of tomorrow, because none of my GW friends have time to hang out. Le sigh. But got to see my good friend Dani from Waseda and play with her kitties, which is always fun. ♥ And at least the weather sucks so I don't mind just reading/napping on the long bus ride back.

I just need to find a job please please please...

Sep. 28th, 2010

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

(no subject)

Ahhhh don't want to take the Japanese and Excel tests at the interview today! =x

Aug. 29th, 2010

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

(no subject)

Back from a visit to England for my cousin's wedding! I'm going to do a type-up of it later (and I took almost 300 photos, holy cow) but for now I am exhausted. I've been up since 5 am English time/midnight East Coast time, and it's now 4:45 at home. And gotta try and stay up so I can get over the jet lag asap.

It was fun, but absolutely exhausting. Dealing with family members who I've only seen a handful of times, and then a (3-day) wedding with about ~200 people, out of whom I knew about 10... Making polite conversation is really tiring, and it was mostly people aged about 30 and up. Plus running around doing touristy things before that. Whew. Need a vacation from my vacation.

But yes, I will do a write-up and put up some photos later. For now... catching up!

Aug. 17th, 2010

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

(no subject)

I haaaate job hunting. :( :( :( So depressing and stressful. Even entry-level jobs want several years of experience and jeez, this economy really sucks for recent grads. Thinking of looking into temping agencies in NYC.

But got a short break as I am going to England tomorrow for my cousin's wedding and touristy stuff, since I haven't visited in 6 or 7 years. Hopefully that will be fun! I am looking forward to a chance to try pubs, since I was too young last time I visited haha.

Jul. 25th, 2010

Angry Eve

Angry. But on 2 hours of sleep so this may be disjointed

This attitude makes me incredibly angry. Woman is at a bar, dancing, when someone else grabs her top and pulls it down, exposing her to the cameras of "Girls Gone Wild." She does not know she is in a video until four years later. She sues Girls Gone Wild - and the jury rules against her.

"The jury foreman explained later to reporters that they figured if she was willing to dance in front of the photographer, she was probably cool with having her breasts on film. They said she gave implicit consent by being at the bar, and by participating in the filming - though she never signed a consent form, and she can be heard on camera saying "no, no" when asked to show her breasts."

WHAT?

Apparently mere presence signifies consent. And dancing for cameras is TOTALLY the same as someone else exposing your breasts to cameras without your explicit consent.

Situations like this need to be made into a big deal, so that people realize it's not okay to assume consent. It doesn't matter what a woman is wearing or doing - unless she tells you yes then don't fucking assume she is consenting. I cannot believe the guy wasn't charged with harassment. Instead the woman is blamed for putting herself in a situation where she shouldn't be surprised at the outcome.

I was talking to my dad about a similar topic a few days ago - we got onto whether it matters what a woman is wearing when she was raped. Dad said that guys just respond to these "signals" that short skirts and low cuts give off, and they're really oblivious to whether or not a girl is interested. I told him that wearing revealing clothing does not mean you want to have sex with just anyone and doesn't even mean you want to hook up with someone. It's cool for hot weather, makes you feel more confident in yourself, just like wearing it for yourself or because yeah, some attention is nice. Doesn't mean we want to have sex with whoever wants us, or that it's okay to be groped.

But he said we shouldn't confuse them with these mixed signals and if a girl is at a certain type of bar, especially wearing revealing clothing then, well, it was stupid of her and she should expect it. I'm sorry? Do guys have no control? I told him that the question of what a woman is wearing should never be asked in legal proceedings about rape (or hell, at any other time!) It has no bearing on the crime. He didn't seem to get that and kept going back to saying it's stupid of her and she should expect it. When I got upset, he laughed and patted my leg, telling me in bemusement, "You're a silly little thing. You get so worked up about this, don't you?"

Yes. I do. Because this whole attitude is about blaming the victim - usually the woman. The onus of avoiding rape (which is generally seen as just violent, forced rape by a stranger) is placed entirely on the woman. Yes, we need to be careful. It's a dangerous world for us unfortunately - we do have to be realistic. I am a pretty paranoid person, BUT. I don't think many guys realize the extent to which woman have to fear and the precautions many women consider on a daily basis. If a woman makes a mistake, if she doesn't always take every single precaution, she still shouldn't be blamed for her rape. And yet so often she is. "What was she wearing?" "Well was she drinking?" If it's domestic abuse - "What did she do to set him off?" "Why didn't she leave?"

But this attitude of blaming the victim does not take into account the societal structures that allow - and excuse - more subtle forms of rape and coercion, or the aspects of society that do not make it clear that what a man is doing is rape, is unwanted, and should not be tolerated.

It is much easier to tell a woman that she wasn't taking enough precautions and that was why she was assaulted or raped. It is easy to make it seem like the only women who get raped are those who drink too much, who wear "slutty" clothing, who put themselves into bad situations. One part of this is that it's comforting for other women. "If I don't do that, it won't happen to me." Societally, drinking is seen to be opt-out rather than opt-in. And yeah, this can get grey at times. Some people enjoy hooking up when drunk. But it shouldn't be assumed, and the culture surrounding drunken sex needs to change. It needs to be made clearer to men that a woman who is drunk cannot give consent and it should not be tolerated. A survey of 1882 college students showed 6% of men admitted to rape or attempted rape - as long as the word 'rape' was not used. But forced sex with violence, verbal abuse, and coercive methods (drinking, drugs) was admitted.

I think this article sums up what we need to do nicely:

"Change the culture. To rape again and again, these men need silence. They need to know that the right combination of factors — alcohol and sex shame, mostly — will keep their victims quiet. Otherwise, they would be identified earlier and have a harder time finding victims. The women in your life need to be able to talk frankly about sexual assault. They need to be able to tell you, and they need to know that they can tell you, and not be stonewalled, denied, blamed or judged.

Change the culture. We are not going to pull six or ten or twelve million men out of the U.S. population over any short period, so if we are going to put a dent in the prevalence of rape, we need to change the environment that the rapist operates in. Choose not to be part of a rape-supportive environment. Rape jokes are not jokes. These guys are telling you what they think. When you laugh along to get their approval, you give them yours. You tell them that the social license to operate is in force; that you’ll go along with the pact to turn your eyes away from the evidence; to make excuses for them; to assume it’s a mistake, of the first time, or a confusing situation. You’re telling them that they’re at low risk.

We need to revoke the rapists’ social license to operate. We need to stop asking, “why do we think he didn’t know she wasn’t consenting,” which is the first question now, really. First as a cultural matter — leaving the legal matter aside — we need to adopt the stance that sexual interaction ought to always be had in a state of affirmative consent by all participants; that anything else is aberrant. If someone says, “I was sexually assaulted,” the first question should be, “why was a person continuing with sexual activity when zir partner did not want to?”"

Issues like the jury deeming this sexual assault of Jane Doe to be not legally sexual assault perpetuate the cloudy societal view of consent and rape and continues to blame the victim rather than the perpetrator.

May. 28th, 2010

Wall-e rain trying so very very hard

(no subject)

Eesh, I need to stop updating this only when I am sad/stressed out, heh.

To that end - I had a great time in NYC. I stayed last Friday-Saturday and this Tuesday-Thursday to see friends. Some former GW students, a GW friend who transferred after freshman year, and a friend from Waseda. Good friends, good food (yum Japanese food - one of the things DC lacked!), overall good times. :) I did a tooon of walking too. Friday I walked from Grand Central to meet up with a friend at Penn Station, to Union Square, and then all the way down to St. Marks. Whew. I find NYC to be more overwhelming than DC or Tokyo, but it's always interesting and it's so nice to get out of the house.

I just wish it wasn't an almost 2-hour trip to get to the city. Ah well, it's a bit of a hassle but not that bad, and the fun makes up for it. :)

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